Another year, another set of Yankee trouncings.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Mes ch\u00e8rs fans-in-hell,
\nIt is with psyche fried in greatest measure that we watch the Twins tonight.
\nAnd now, it\u2019s unlikely we relax; we just boggle and stare
\nAs this Target Field club shall present\u2026
\n\u2026no winner.<\/p>\n
Failed the test, failed the test,
\nFans were nervous, rightly guessed
\nThat the Yankees landed spankies
\nOn our bottoms all abscessed.
\nNo one spurs, just demurs
\nTo the pinstripe-donned monsieurs;
\nAs the rout gets ever vicious,
\nAre they trying? Not auspicious!
\nTake a swing? Not a chance,
\nJust a swivel in the pants
\nWhile the stadium in unison gets stressed;
\nThough it\u2019s a lovely venue,
\nThere\u2019s no joy here when you
\nFailed the test, failed the test, failed the test!<\/p>\n
Looked like poo in their play:
\nBradley rocked and sent away,
\nLarnach\u2019s grounders mean he founders;
\nBack to rounders or croquet.
\nAt their home unprepared,
\nAnd the Pohlads haven\u2019t cared:
\nNone are lower than the owners\u2014
\nNeed a kick in their cojoners.
\nTrade the best, sack the scouts,
\nPlug their ears to all our pouts
\nWhile they\u2019re crowing in their suits that they\u2019re the best;
\n(Yes, I\u2019m a caustic critic\u2014
\nJoe is parasitic.)
\nFailed the test,
\n(And the rest? Many DUDS devoid of zest.)
\nFailed the test, failed the test, failed the test!<\/p>\n
Still are some uncurving,
\nOf the STUD mark too deserving;
\nBrooks and Royce and Austin, choice with bat and ball.
\nSomeday, there\u2019ll be days when this is fruitful;
\nCurrently, we doubt they\u2019ll show at all.
\nFor years they\u2019ve been losing
\nIn a streak that\u2019s most confusing;
\nIt\u2019s a great surprise if they should end our ills.
\nMost days leave us feeling like an ass\u2019le\u2026
\nStrings a-snapping daily
\nLike a broken ukulele!<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a test, it\u2019s a test,
\nJust another sporting quest.
\n(Goose\u2019s cunning with this punning
\nGets the Comment Here Addressed.)
\nDoes it hurt? Does it sting?
\nEvery evening, hands we wring.
\nWhile the offense fumbles rallies,
\nI\u2019ll be sadly watching tallies;
\nWill they boil, getting hot?
\nIt\u2019s a wish, but likely not.
\nClean it up? We know that Joe ain\u2019t acquiesced.
\nWe might be loyal, true,
\nBut this is Number Two:
\nThey failed the test,
\nFailed the test, failed the test, failed the test\u2026<\/p>\n
Failed the test, failed the test;
\nWhy this passion we invest?
\nWe\u2019ve been fearing life of jeering,
\nBut this year we can\u2019t digest.
\nWe\u2019ve been had, we\u2019ve been fleeced
\nBy the owners\u2019 pockets greased.
\nNow the exit queues are growing;
\nOur enthusiasm\u2019s going\u2026<\/p>\n
\u2026Score by score, run by run,
\nMaking outs? The Twins aren\u2019t fun!
\nThat\u2019s the season\u2019s awful truth that we\u2019ve confessed.
\nTonight the Twins are beaten
\n\u2018Cause that wealthy cretin
\nFailed the test, failed the test, failed the test:
\nHe failed the test!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Another year, another set of Yankee trouncings. Mes ch\u00e8rs fans-in-hell, It is with psyche fried in greatest measure that we watch the Twins tonight. And now, it\u2019s… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":94902,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-94892","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-hot-news"],"yoast_head":"\n