Sometimes, everything goes exactly according to plan. It’s so rare, both in life and in baseball, that when it does happen it’s almost surprising.

Tonight was one of those nights for the Red Sox. They had Garrett Crochet on the mound, and he went seven strong innings. His job was made easy by an offense that exploded for five home runs, racked up 14 hits, ten runs, and only struck out five times. The defense behind him made no errors, the bullpen was lightly used, and fans who wanted to check out early to go watch the Celtics playoff game missed nothing but low leverage, late inning at bats. Everybody got exactly what they wanted!

This thing was so out of hand early, the final score actually undersells it. An hour into the game, the exit velocity leaderboard looked like this:

As a side note, it’s a kind of funny Bo Bichette ended near the top of this list tonight because he hasn’t hit a home run in almost a year (May 27th, 2024).

The blowout gave our friend Anna the ability to keep crocheting with Crochet in peace. Here’s her latest progress:

But hey, you want to see all the home runs. So here they are in five studs (everybody who went yard today).

Five Studs

Jarren Duran:

Led off the game with a solo home run. It was a harbinger of things to come.

Alex Bregman:

Later in the inning, Bregman followed suit with another club.

Kristian Campbell:

The rookie sensation continues to show off his ability to whack the ball to the opposite field.

Rafael Devers:

The most impressive home run of the night. This baseball was absolutely mauled!

Wilyer Abreu:

He did something no other Sox player managed to do tonight: Hit a home run with men on base. Amazingly, this is the twelfth three-run bomb of the year for the Sox, which doubles up the next closest team as nobody else has more than six.

Interestingly, after that third inning, the Sox didn’t hit another home run for the rest of the night. They just relied on Crochet going on cruise control. And yes, he at least deserves a mention in the studs section despite not fitting the theme.

Three Duds

Everybody in the Sox lineup who didn’t hit a home run (except Triston Casas because he recorded a pair of hits)

Sorry Trevor Story (1-4), Ceddanne Rafaela (0-5), and Carlos Narvaez (1-4). Bring the lumber to the next home run party!

Plays of the Game

The home runs of course! Here they are again altogether.